I was living up in Rogers Park and drinking a lot in those days. My friend Kevin was staying with me because he had no where to live and we were out at one of the many dive bars in the area. We were very drunk and there was a crack gal sitting next to us a few old drunk men. When someone asked us about what we did we told them we were zoo keepers. We went on at great length on the many animals we took care of and their various diets. I even got philosophical expounding on the soul of the animal. The bartender was touched and told us about his dog. Later on the crack gal came over to our place to free-base cocaine and hang out. She wanted money and told us we could fuck her. We declined and told her we had to get up early and attend to our animals at the zoo.


- Ussama Alshaibi