I used to work this crappy job at a store where we took credit cards over the phone and also cash and check sales from walk ins. The owner of the business was an asshole he took money out of our checks for shit we didn't do, insisting we had taken a longer break or not come in for a few hours when we were sick (no punch clock, just his own imagination was our timecard.) He also never paid his bills and huge hulking garbage and delivery guys were always coming in to threaten us cause our boss owed them money.

One day I accidentally, truly, misplaced a credit card order and put it in with the cash slips. It never got ran through so later in the night I put it through and realized no one really kept track of how I charged these things just as long as they matched the days receipts. I also remembered once having to cancel a credit card charge and voiding it out. I took 60 dollars from the cash drawer and then charged an extra 60 to a customer's credit card. Then the next morning I called up the credit card company and voided it out. My theory as long as they weren't really charged most people don't care if there is a credit NON CHARGE on their visa slip especially if it is a business they just bought something from they figure it was just a mistake and forget it.

I started slow. One credit card the first day, then I was doing 5 a day. In the course of a week cash sales had mysteriously dropped to less than a hundred dollars . The divorcee middle-aged Russian accountant, with her biracial kids always screaming at her on the phone, didn't seem to notice the voids as anything out of the ordinary. As long as the amount of sales matched the total revenue cards, cash and checks, no one seemed to care. Cash was slowly becoming extinct. When asked by the boss a month or so later about the drop I said people like using their cards. It got crazy, after a couple months I just couldn't bring myself to leave more than a pitiful mélange of singles and fives left in the cash drawer. A couple people did call in to complain when I guess I had forgotten or mismanaged voiding their cards but I answered the phone and told them it would be dealt with.

It all came to and end when I decided to leave for a month or so get out of town of my own accord. My last day I stole more than ever and even took some product for the first time. I made twice what I would have given the measly wages. Almost a year later I got a call from the boss. Surprising since it was a new phone# but I guess he tracked me down, he asked me if I ever noticed anything funny with the Russian accountant apparently she had been bilking him for years. I said no never a thing and that was the last I heard of them. The only remarkable thing is to this day I don't fell guilty, do not even think it was wrong. I just think about what a fucking asshole that boss was and how it was a pleasure to screw him. Now as a older wiser man I work for myself own a business and if some kid tries that with me I will cut his balls off, I guess its just all part of the cycle of life.


- Ben Berkowitz